Thursday, February 25, 2010

Barbie Dolls

Have you heard the old saying, “I hate Barbie, that bitch has everything?” I have. I’ve been accused of being Barbie, which is funny because I am built more like Barney Rubble, I’m freckled head to toe and been told I resemble Rosie O’Donnell.

I could go off topic and tell you a story about how my sister and brother once held me down and played “connect the dots” on my freckles with a Sharpie, but that is a story for another day.

I had tons of Barbie’s when I was a child. They were my favorite toys. Lori (Fennel) Jagger and I played Barbie’s our entire childhood. We played them at home, and also had a Barbie hideaway in the back of my closet at our house in Lake Arrowhead. It was Barbie heaven; because we were allowed to leave our Barbie’s set up without dismantling them for weeks and months on end. Funny side note about the Barbie closet. It’s where my Dad used to hide the liquor when my Grandparents, strict Quakers, would visit the Lake Arrowhead house.

Back to Barbie’s, and gossip, because people sure love to gossip, don’t they? Even your friends, about you. My friends tell me gossip they’ve heard about me from my other people. I’ve heard I’m that bitch Barbie, with “everything.” I don’t even know what “having everything” means.

I’ve heard I don’t know anything about having difficult teenagers because my children are perfect. I’ve heard I don’t know anything about marriage because my husband is perfect. I’ve heard I’m holy and perfect because I take my kids to church every Sunday. I’ve been told I’m clueless about hard work because I’m a housewife. I am completely baffled. I wish I had video tapes of my everyday life, in my house, with my family, to show people. No one would see Barbie.

Those reported words of gossip are inflicted pain. Gossip is bad from beginning to end. It doesn’t need to be started, and it sure doesn’t need to be reported to the victim. I’m not better for knowing I’ve been a victim. Those words hurt. I bet anyone reading this has been the victim of a word inflicted, wound to the heart. Barbie doesn’t exist in reality. She is simply a precious toy for children. We all need to be kinder, don’t we? I’ll try harder.

Lori and I can vouch that our Barbie’s didn’t have “everything.” Our Mom’s gave us fabric remnants and taught us how to sew. We learned how to use a sewing machine, and a needle & thread so we could make Barbie blankets, sleeping bags and pillows. We also learned how to make Barbie clothes. We learned how to sew zippers, snaps, hooks & eyes on the garments, thus giving us lifelong skills. Our Dad’s gave us scraps of wood and other things from our yards so we could make Barbie furniture. We’d scour the nearby fields of Placentia for coins to save up if we wanted some special Barbie accessory.

Our Barbie’s were not allowed to cheat life by “jumping walls” and had to be well behaved, be completely dressed, have their hair combed & have pin head pierced earrings on. Our early play with Barbie’s was in fact a good analogy for who we are as women today.

Lori and I don’t have “everything.” We don’t try to cheat life by “jumping any walls.” We are usually well behaved and we work very hard.

For anyone to reduce my hard work and make thoughtless, flippant remarks that I have no understanding about something because my life, husband, children, family, etc., “are perfect” is downright cruel, plus horribly incorrect. If I have come by success in my life, my marriage, with my family and children, it is due to good old fashioned hard work and faith. I get up like the rest of the world, put on my big girl panties, and try to make the best of each day.

I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me. Philippians 4:13


  1. Amen sister!!!! Good for you and you are so right on!! Gossip is mean and it does hurt and I think it is sparked by jealousy and/or stupidity....take your pick. If people spent half as much time worrying about their own lives as they did about others this world would be a much better place.
    Keep blogging, I love it and you. xoxoxo

  2. Good word, Jodi! I am looking forward to making your blog a part of each day!!

  3. I absolutely love your blog!!! It's so beautiful, and I think it is the most fantastic idea, not only for all of us who are going to have the pure joy of laughing are asses off every time we log in (is that what you do on a blog? log in or on) but I believe it will especially bless you. I have always felt that the secret path to your soul is through your writing. I think this will begin a new chapter of healing and growth for you and will surely bless and entertain your friends and soon-to-be avid followers. I agree you should not edit. Raw is where you are at your best and you are already a superb writer, you don't have to worry whether or not it will be written well. I tried to post all of this on your blog yesterday but after I had subscribed or joined or whatever it still would not let me post without an account. You will have to walk me through it. Bravo for taking on this very brave and grand adventure... I can't wait!

    That was the post I tried to do yesterday...for posterity
    I hadn't read the blog though, I had only seen it.

    You are absolutely right about gossip, it is has become so enmeshed in people's dialogue, probably because some people have nothing to say. Who are these people? They must not know you very well. Anyone who knows you, knows that you are one of the hardest working, most disciplined people on earth. The important things matter to you and you don't take any short cuts when it comes to the really big stuff in life. It is something I have always admired about you, and Ken. Your children are awesome, not only because they are two of the sweetest angels put on earth, but because you and Ken never waiver when it comes to the hard part of parenting.
    I have watched you apply that same commitment and discipline to being a wife, and daughter, and friend. I can say from experience you are one of the best friends anyone could ask for. Someone who will drop everything to help you, or comfort you. The real reason someone who didn't know you very well might think you had a Barbie life is because... YOU NEVER COMPLAIN!!!

    I love you and your blog!

  4. Now I know why she married me. I wish I didn't have to ride around in that pink convertible - Ken :)

  5. It's the smile, cousin. People always think you're up to no good when you have a smile like that....I can think of a few other people in the fam who had famous grins, too. :)